#It's technically human meat of course they won't eat it

[amphiptere-art]

Amphs demons.

I will note. This can go for most things in a locked door also. It is more of a general understanding, than a specific mythos for my DCA stuff.

So let's get this started. One of these days I really got to make a locked door post. Or at least a locked door God's post. Because there's a lot I'm going to be referencing in accordance with that. So if you get a little lost about me talking about a specific god, That's my fault.

First let's talk about demons appearances.

Demons and fay are actually categorized under the same umbrella for me. So technically demons can look like Faye. As much as faye and look like demons. The biggest difference between the two is that faye usually embody a meaning. Demons actually do actions for humans.

Now of course this doesn't mean there isn't a general look. I'm just saying they realistically could look like anything. Demons usually take on the shape of either an animal, or a uniquely morphed human. Scales, feathers, runic symbols, and even unique items can shape a demon. Many demon epithets based on their looks. Actually have nothing to do with their powers.

Demon diets and lifestyles.

Many demons lifestyles I will go through more detail in the categories. As it does change somewhat. Although for most demons it is a general look similar to human lifestyle. They usually have a home, with appliances, a place to sleep, and a place for hygiene. They can go walk out into a town and buy food and other things. It is not that different. Although there is of course natural wildlife demons can hunt.

Demon diet is usually just your standard form of meat or veggies. Most are omnivorous. Although there are some that are confined to a carnivorous or herbivorous diet. They usually hunt the more animal like demons about hell. Although there are those that are forced to have unique diets. This can include something as simple as only being able to eat fruits, do something like a cannibalistic forced diet.

Usually these cannibalistic diets pause the demon to take on a unique style of life. Contract like demons Will usually make a contract that will ease and even benefit that style. While others will take to seeking out specific shop owners with demons of their specific diet. Many do not judge those with a cannibalistic style. As it is legitimately a genetic trait. They are not the minority, and some demons think it is a natural way to cleanse their numbers as infinite creatures.

Now let's get into different types of demons, and their powers respectively.

Contract type demons.

There are two types of ways a demon could make themselves useful to a human. Which is either through actions, or through magic. While most demons lean one way or the other depending on what the human wishes. Technically anything could be done through an action or magic. Although depending on what it is could cause terrible actions if you do not consider it.

Consider if you asked to be taller. While a magic type demon could do that easily. An action type demon would probably rip your legs off and do something terrible to make you taller. Make sure you summon the right type of demon for the job.

While most demons won't accept a contract that they cannot fulfill. There are still chances some malicious demons will go through it anyways. But most demons split upon this line. One based on more magical type wishes. The other based on wishes that are easier done physically.

Now this doesn't mean that action demons don't have magic. Usually they just struggle with it. And in some rare cases it can cause them pain. Doesn't mean that magic is not available to them. It's usually just not worth trouble. Much like how a magic demon can also do physical stuff. But it's just not worth the trouble when you have magic

Now I'm just going to go through a list of deals you can make. Remember either one could do the same. It's usually just better to do it with one demon over the other. I will try and emphasize this with 🐈 for action demons, and 🐈‍⬛ for magic demons.

What type of deals you can make with demons.

We've already split demons into the category of action and magic. But we can split a little bit further.

Physical augmentation. 🐈‍⬛

Actions of blood. 🐈

Seeking knowledge. 🐈‍⬛

Giving of items. 🐈

Scapegoat actions. 🐈

Control-based. 🐈‍⬛

Splitting of power. 🐈‍⬛

Affairs of the heart. 🐈‍⬛🐈

Many of these categories can be split into smaller pieces.

Physical augmentation

It is basically as the title describes. Some sort of physical augmentation. This could be-

Getting taller

Having more strength

Better voice

Better sight

Better agility

Claws

Wings

Etc. this is better used by magic type demons. Although if you wish to improve your body through more legitimate means. You can seek out an action demon. Although you better make sure they will teach you, instead of rip you apart.

Actions of blood.

Actions of blood have a lot more variety. Although almost all of them involve the spilling of blood in one way or another.

Aggressive actions of revenge.

Massacre of a certain party.

Death to a certain being.

Killing of their own demonic kin.

Receiving a certain body part.

Harvesting of blood and bodies.

Tattoos.

Ect. Many action type demons take these jobs. As while a magic type demon could make somebody disappear. Many more wish to see the actual violence. Which is the main part of this entire category. Violence. Any sort of violence.

Seeking of knowledge.

Speaking of knowledge is of course self-explanatory. As it is gaining knowledge or wisdom through any means.

Gaining knowledge in a certain subject.

All the answers to a certain test.

Knowing the true events of an event

Knowledge of magical practices.

Etc. this category actually has some overlap with the item giving category. As magic demons can instantly give the knowledge. While action demons have to go out and get it. Although some, if they have it, Will verbally tell.

Giving of items.

Giving of items also usually includes access to areas. As it is the manification of a physical want.

Gaining a book or tome.

Access to a certain place.

Summoning of items.

Giving of items.

Manifestation of a certain structure.

Giving of money.

Ect. Action demons usually use the giving of items as a way to plunder their claws into other categories. Although this category still has some use for magic type demons. As it is usually easier to magic a house than to build it.

Scapegoat actions

Scapegoat actions just means to do something into humans place. Which could be a myriad of things.

Robbing a store for them.

Allowing them to cheat.

Taking there spot in jail.

Staying back in a situation so they can go and explore.

Taking their sins.

Ect. These are usually some of the most non-villainous acts a demon can perform other than physical augmentation. They are not blood demons, so they do not go out to kill for humans. But anything else is fair game. This category can sometimes bleed into the item giving category. As robberies are the easiest way for action demons to get items.

Control based.

These usually include control of some sort. Whether that is brainwashing, or putting somebody in a higher position.

Brainwashing somebody.

Brainwashing an entire city.

Trapping their demonic companions for multiple free contracts.

Helping somebody get to a higher military rank.

Helping somebody get to a higher political rank.

Changing somebody from mid-class to high class.

Ect. Control based demon can usually lead to cult like activity. As it is often that somebody wishes to be higher than their peers. Action demons can sometimes help with this category. Although it can be as long and as strenuous as any real life scenario. This is usually dealt with by magic demons. As it is quick and easy for them.

Splitting of power.

This usually pertains to gaining similar abilities to the demon in question. Which leads to some variety.

Getting a demons at supernatural strength

Getting a demons supernatural sight

Getting a demon's scales and claws

Getting a demons physical appearance.

Getting a demon's magical capabilities

Ect. As we can see, these demons can almost make humans demons themselves. This can also lead to cult like activity. As a simple act of having demon like abilities usually puts you in a higher position. Although many people who do it this way, mean to do something more forceful with those powers.

Affairs of the heart.

This usually has anything to do with love and the pleasure of sex.

Making somebody fall in love with you

Becoming a partner.

Making somebody fertile.

Improving there's lovers "action in bed".

Enhancing ones children.

Enhancing one's partner.

Ect. They're also is a good amount of physical augmentation heart demons can do. Although they are simply merely the same as the physical augmentation demons. This has a wide variety of uses. Action demons and magic demons will help people in these categories. Action demons in particular will sometimes take their lover's place without the contractors know.

Spirits and Dead.

Almost all demons can access the dead and their spirits. Although any demon that tells you they can resurrect them is a liar. Demons cannot resurrect the dead. If you have been sleeping with a resurrected past lover, It is likely the demon itself, or a puppeted corpse concealed by a spell.

While some demons might consider themselves exclusively Resurrection or soul-speaking demons. That is not a proper category. As all demons can grant you with due to their connection to the realm of death. Although these "Resurrection demons" are noticeably better at it.

Contracts and how they function for demons.

All of the aforementioned deals above. Of course have positive reinforcements as to why demons would do them. This small section will conclude what those contracts do for demons. And how a demon doesn't die if they are not contracted enough.

First of all contracts seem to work as a form of a paycheck. While this paycheck could be in food, luxuries, or homes. It is usually transferred into a type of demonic currency. Which can be used to gain those other items through paying. Demon society is relatively close to ours. As I've only talked about contract demons. That might seem not so. But there are other types of demons that do other things.

Now it is undeterminable how much money is the baseline. I can say with confidence though, but the more a specific contract demon category is utilized by humans. Increases in how much money. For example, scapegoat type demons are rather popular. And so they have some of the highest paychecks.

No of course there is the question of how a demon supplies themselves if they do not get contracts. Luckily they seem to have a buffer system. As a demon is given some sort of paycheck by the end of each month. It is some sort of general average of what other demons in their category made. Which can be good or bad depending on how popular the category is.

Humans themselves can give tips. Although it is not in the form of the demonic currency. Instead it is usually physical. Demons will often take appliances. Some demons take blood. As it is a form of energy to demons. Blood sacrifices are usually used to just get a light bulb to work. A similar thing happens with bodies.

Now let's get onto those other demons I spoke of.

Wandering demons.

This one would be the standard demon you imagine. One that's not necessarily defined by anything. But usually are considered to walk around and try and trick people into selling their souls or tempting them into damnation. That's not essentially a wandering demon's life. But it's what most humans would think of.

But for the most part these demons just embody a part of life. Emotions, wants, sins. They usually either radiate or tempt people to engage in these types of behaviors. These demons also have a mischief demon variation. For example most unseelie Fae are mischief demons. But a unique subset of them act like wandering demons. And will sometimes be considered as such.

These demons can also somewhat do contract demon contracts. It's not necessarily discouraged. But they are often bad at it. Their magic is more about messing with somebody's head then helping a human with a certain thing. If a wandering demon does make a contract. They will usually be doing it through physical actions. Which can end up with disastrous results depending on the contract.

Soul contract.

This contract though is unique to wandering demons. Some contract demons can take it but usually they don't. A soul contract is a type of payment a human can pay the wandering demon. Mostly to get them to leave them alone. Sometimes it is with the sacrifice of their own soul. But for the most part it is through the sacrifice of others soul. These soul act as a counter for payment. Some more souls a demon gets the more their general salary. Working in a similar way to the contracts demons contract level. But instead it's a soul level.

Usually if you're giving up your own soul, It's to give up into whatever temptation the demon is giving. The demon will usually put you in a hotspot for whatever temptation you decided to give into. Or at least will give it to you after you die. Although either way you are in an illusion, and technically in that demon's vault.

For those that choose to sacrifice others souls though. It is usually a way to get out. You will kill, tempt, or sacrifice, another person's soul to be in your place. This usually results in the demon jumping over to another person, or for the demon to simply kill the chosen soul and take them to they're vault.

But let's talk about the different sins, emotions, and actions, wandering demons usually represent.

Now there's technically a lot of sins, and emotions that humans could do, and these demons could represent. So I'm only going to go over the major sins and major emotions.

Pride

These types of demons will always make humans or other demons feel a sense of pride. This sort of pompous exterior. They will often seek more worth in themselves. They will usually make humans have less care for their family members. More focused on supporting themselves.

Greed

This often materializes as material wants. Sometimes they referred to as the dragon curse demons. Anyone affected by this demon will suddenly start hoarding. Often the demons themselves are hoarders. This usually results in the affected humans doing robbery, and other dastardly deeds just to get objects.

Lust

As the name implies. These types of demons make people lustful. Wishing for affairs of the heart. Offering to the point of it being wrong. These demons themselves though usually go through heat's. So it's not all unfair. Some of these demons actually do though go for the more club like mannerisms. And are often found hidden in such environments.

Envy

These types of demons make people wishful. Usually about themselves. A human will suddenly not feel tall enough, strong enough, smart enough. These demons themselves can usually struggle from the same feelings. And will mask themselves in jewelry and cloaks. Inadvertently usually making their charm work better.

Gluttony

These demon make people insatiably hungry. Sometimes to the point of being ravenous. It is often that they are the quickest for somebody to want them to go away. Since these demons usually cause their humans to get closer to death quicker, with just enough time for the human to notice. These demons themselves usually don't even store souls in a vault. They usually eat them to satiate their own hunger.

Wrath

Sometimes these demons just embody anger. But for the most part it just fills them with a need for violence. And they often create panic killers, and often are the silent followers of serial killers. They themselves usually struggle with bursts. And will sometimes team up with blood contract demons just for the thrill.

Sloth

These types of demons will usually make a person lazy. Dangerously lazy. Sometimes to the point of not caring for oneself. These demons themselves sometimes struggle to even go out and get victims. So they will likely just rest in a house and watch as people come and go. Affecting all there.

Power

These type of demons make people want power. Usually through controlling others, or even just gaining a higher rank. This can be done through various means. But a human will often escalate slowly. These demons themselves usually say they are the best type of demon. Or we'll even surround themselves with contract demons, and take their pay.

Grief

These demons will often attach themselves to people who are struggling. They often make sad feelings or grief last for much longer. Sometimes to the point that the human doesn't even know why they're sad. These demons themselves will often be depressed. Only going after victims because they don't want to be alone.

Energy

These demons can make somebody a workaholic. They feel somebody up with a unnecessary amount of energy. A reverse of this demon often referred to sleep does the opposite. Most of these demons think they are helping. And they themselves are usually energized, and active.

And there are plenty more. But I hope this gets the point across. But for the most part the demons are bunched into these categories. But they will often split out into more sins, emotions, actions, and are different from each other.

Now do remember. Some wandering demons force feelings upon others. Utilizing their magic. Some are more suggestive. Usually not utilizing that magic. And others have no control. Having some sort of ambient magic. And then there is the unique subset that just acts like a certain feeling.

This usually can be improved by a demon's age. And they will choose what they particularly want by adulthood. But if a demon is stunted in this learning. Then it usually will go to the ambient option. This magic also can affect demons around them. At least if the demons don't have protections.

Wandering demon payments, and general lifestyle.

This is just a small rehash of how contracts work but with some new words.

There are two ways that these demons usually get paid. Or are at least encouraged to do their acts. Which is through the soul contracts mentioned earlier. Or through their level of temptation.

Much like before. There's technically a baseline that all demons get paid. Increased for each variant, but for the most part the same. But this baseline can be increased. In a similar way to how contract demons can have an increase in pay by the amount of contracts they sell. Wandering demons can get a increase in pay by the amount of souls and temptation they gather.

To explain the soul contracts again. It is usually just a way for a human to either fall into their temptation or be rid of the demon. These souls offer a pretty generous boost. And these souls are usually stored in a vault. Humans that meet this fate are stuck. They can neither go to heaven or hell. They are usually in a sort of trance. Literally kept as a ghost like soul in a separate dimension that is the vault. The more of these souls in the vault the higher their pay. The initial sale will often lead to a immediate payment. But then it just acts as a standard boost.

The second way wandering demons can increase their pay. Is through temptation. While it doesn't offer as much as a boost. It can often stack and is easier to do. Temptation stacks with every action a human does outside of the demons magical abilities. So while the demon might start a certain cycle. If they can let go and the human continues. That temptation will start to stack. Demons that use this will usually jump human to human. They will start the temptation and then leave the human to start it in another. Often having a good 5 to 20 victims that they are currently watching. It's like stocks but for demons.

Either way the demon does it. Each one basically adds an imaginary 1% increase to their payments. Their payments are of course magical by nature. And since wandering demons don't necessarily need to go out and work for too long. Mostly because of the ambientness of their abilities. They usually become shopkeepers and other general civilization builders.

And again. Some mischief type demons can have wandering demon type effects. They aren't exactly hybrids. But I usually either considered a subset of mischief demons, or wandering demons. They also usually make more unusual contracts. Often resulting in objects and fun instead of the standard wandering demons souls and contract even contracts. They usually don't mean anything to these types of demons.

Speaking of mischief demons though.

Mischief type demons.

This is another category that interact with humans commonly. Although usually not for their benefit. Mischief type is what most humans call them. The demons themselves like to be called Unseelie. Which yes, these are the demons mostly associated with Faye.

Mischief type demons can take many forms. Although many of these are considered supernatural. Ghosts, trolls, poltergeist, kelpies, vampires, werewolves, demon fairies, etc. in all honesty, there is too many to list. Just know that with confidence, any supernatural creature that usually has it bad story behind it. Is likely a mischief demon.

You can split these demon sometimes by Cryptid, Unseelie, and Haunting.

Cryptids are almost every mischief demon that makes themselves physical and messes around with humans. These are your vampires, werewolves, Kelpie, black dogs, Bigfoot, beast of gevaudan, mothman, ect. These demons were tad more aggressive in the older times. But they still wander around causing fear.

Unseelie are mostly demons that remain in their separate plane. Often making joke contracts and missing around with humans through general jokes. Although they are usually also the goodest demons. A lot of these demons do sometimes act like wander demons. Were they embody a certain aspect of life.

Haunting Is ghost demons that are pretending to be actual ghosts. They keep themselves invisible and will often cause a physical ruckus. Enjoying the fact that humans can't understand what's happening, and claim it on innocent ancestors. They are also very commonly the ones that curse areas. Making it so people get turned around and can't find their way home.

For note. A quiet haunting is usually not a mischief demon. It is things like poltergeist like ghosts that are these demons. Also many ruckus making ghosts are these demons. Actual ghosts usually mean no harm towards family's living in their area. Although it is not unknown for ghosts to want a room to themselves. Mischief demons parading as ghosts though. Will cause the most ruckus and aggressive acts throughout a household. Usually concluding with the whole house being condemned for being "hunted".

The physical look of these demons of course heavily verifies. Usually you can split it unsteadily down the middle between The physical ones and the invisible ones. Physical ones will take on any shape available. Vampires disguise themselves as humans, a kelpie looks like a horse with seaweed, They can be impeccably tiny little evil things. The invisible ones are of course, invisible. They share about the same variety as many demons in their home realm. The only difference is that usually they can fit in a human house.

Powers again have a wide range. Things like vampires and werewolves are like a disease. Sharing their power in a forceful way. Many of the more faye like demons are good at magic. Using it in any way possible. There are those that are more animalistic. Such like the kelpie. Where it's hunting method is just unsettling. They're of course are those that just want to cause trouble. Whether that be a troll using their physical bulk. For the many invisible demons who levitate around and cause a ruckus. Many of these demons also usually have control over the Earth and illusions. Making crooked looking trees.

Because of the fact that these mischief demons usually make their homes in the real world. Even if it is on a separate plane. They don't really need or seek out any sort of demonic payment. They just steal. Sure every once in awhile they will wander down to hell to get the nicest of amenities. And their homes are usually still there. At least for the ones that are in separate realms. But for the most part they have a vacation home in the real world. Were they usually blend into real society, use the environment itself to make a home, Or just have a standalone home in the demon realm that they sleep in.

If these demons do want to get paid. They get paid in a similar way that wandering demons get paid with temptation. Except instead of temptation. It's usually through fear and notoriety. These demons will literally use the media as a type of marker for their payment. If a demon have gotten so many scared of them that everyone knows not to go to their area. Then they're practically rich. Although this richness can fail if they're notoriety turns into obscurity.

Now on to what is basically normal hell demons.

Keeper demons.

Keeper demons are the ones that actually stay in hell. While there was one more category that does sometimes interact with human realm. That usually is not of their choice. Keeper demons stay at home. And have many duties.

Now unlike many stories. Demons actually don't enjoy their jobs of beating the damned. Although it is not all bad. There are of course many people who deserve any punishments. Many of these Killers. Many others do not tho. The religion that usually sends people to hell usually has spiculous rules. Causing many people who are dealers or smokers who are good people to be sent hells way. Hell luckily has the keeper demons that make their new life much more fun.

While the name keeper demon feels people with the sense of being stuck. Which they are. Most keeper demons act like normal humans. Many of these demons have more luxury to smoke and draw bets due to not holding a strict religion of their own. Many are just people. There are carpenters, dressers, cooks, and any other human job you can usually imagine. There isn't much in a justice system. As usually their demonic rules are seemingly enforced through other means. But otherwise it is relatively the same.

They only difference is that there are two specific keeper demons that are separate from the rest. These are usually known as guardians and tormentors.

Guardians

Guardians of course are usually guards. They are the closest things to angels demons will probably have. An example of one of these demons is Cerberus. Although he only ruled for an age and retired. Others have taken up their place. There's usually a guardian for every human region. Sometimes it gets specific down to the state. While they are few, They are very strong. At any demon that wishes to challenge them will surely regret it.

Guardians also usually keep souls in. And this includes demons themselves. As while you might state that demons go to the human world through contracts all the time. That is untrue. They are usually tethered by the human. If the human dies or if the deal is done. Demons will teleport straight back. I mischief demons aren't really there. They're in this weird in between gate that allows them to interact but not get in trouble. Any demon that actually makes it out of the confines of hell is hunted by the guardians.

Tormentors

Then there of course the tormentors. Tormentors are explanatory. If you were imagining some deep red being with horns tugging on a fiery whip as what you expected most demons look like. That is what these are. Tormentor demons handle the people that demons themselves decide as evil. These sections are usually hidden and deep. Tormentor demons is the most legal job a demon can get. Many do not like it though. So the gnashing teeth of a tormentor demon is usually not a disguise.

While guardian and tormentor demons have higher powers. Usually respectively in strength, magic, and the ability to see things many other demons won't. Running keep your demons just have an average amount of magic and an average amount of strength. Imagine a world made of apprentice wizards. What is the extent of most keeper demons. Enough to live a naturally supernatural life, what's similar enough you wouldn't feel out of place in their home.

Many souls actually turn into keeper demons. Wild souls can choose to restrain themselves to their ghostly human looks. They can become a demon whatever they please. And yes they can become a specific demon. Most choose keepers because they have no external rules or weird circumstances. There's a reason most keeper demons are standard.

Animalistic demons.

Animalistic demons are our last category. These demons usually do not have any magic. Can be summoned but not contracted. And of course unintelligent. Although one type of animalistic demon is smarter.

Animalistic demons are usually animals. Supernatural and strange looking yes, but just animals. There is one demon in this category that isn't quite just animalistic. Although they aren't as smart as many on the list.

These demons are imps. The only reason they are considered in the animalistic category is because of their natural urges. Imps can write and talk. Although it is basic. They unfortunately do not think about hygiene or cleanliness. They can often act like animals running a muck. They have a pack like nature. And hunt much more than other demons. The best correlation is like a chimp. They can be extremely smart if taught. But it is simply not their nature.

Every other demon in this section though is not intelligent enough. There are usually allegories to the human world. Birds, dogs, cats, horses, you name it. There's usually a demon equivalent. Hellhounds are of course the ones many know. Although that is simply just a fancy term for a demon dog. Although do not confine yourself to a quadruped stance. An animalistic demon can look just as human like as any other. The only difference is their mind.

This concludes everything I can think of.

Remember demons easily fit in among faye. And I myself as a creator see them as one of the same. The only difference is that demons are usually the more malicious type. There's a reason the mischief type category was so bare bones in its explanation. There are simply too many things I consider demons underneath. As I just correlate demons with the bad mythological creatures.

Hope you guys like this rundown.

[suzukiblu]

Headcanons for @bicherrim, based on the concept "Something about Antonio’s gift? His powers may be listed as “talks to animals”, but considering every animal in Encanto essentially shows up to swear fealty to him the moment he gets his gift, it might be something more than that."

Antonio, of course, is five and has no concept of anything past "oh cool, animals are talking to me! :D" The animals are a bit more like "oh cool, someone who can tell the humans stuff for us and owns a luxurious jungle paradise that we can all live in safe from the elements/getting eaten! :D" The animals are all about that. Although at the same time, the animals are also far more interested in Antonio than in any other humans no matter what.

Basically any animal is more interested in Antonio than any other human, barring special cases where the human of interest has spent a lot of time forming a bond with them, i.e. Luisa making sure the donkeys don't get lost/hurt or Bruno taking care of the rats in the walls (the rats absolutely sell out Bruno's entire lack of self-care to Antonio, of course. ABSOLUTELY they do). But animals are naturally drawn to Antonio and he is similarly drawn to them, and the vast majority of them reflexively like and trust him. This is probably a facet of his power but not one he's actually aware of, and since he feels similarly about them it probably won't be occurring to him, at least not anytime soon.

Seriously, even the jaguar instantly likes and listens to him. That MIGHT just be the jaguar going "this is an optimal survival strategy in a place full of humans" but chances of it at least PARTIALLY being "Antonio puts off an aura of trustworthiness and authority that animals can sense" are also pretty high. Probably said aura wouldn't work if he had a different personality, but since he DOES have his personality, that's how it works.

The animals really will sell out anyone for Antonio. Sometimes they're selling them out for their own GOOD (Luisa, put down those donkeys and TAKE THE DANG COCONUT DRINK), but they have no desire or inclination to keep things from him or lie to him. They trust him implicitly and believe he's Doing His Best at pretty much all times.

Spontaneously vegetarian-possibly-vegan Antonio is GO. Also, no one is going to be preparing ANY meat dishes ANYWHERE near him anytime soon. Technically he's like, "well, the jaguar needs to eat meat too so I get it" but also, like . . . he's five. He's very much five.

[poptimus-prime]

Try this one on for size, assuming they could eat and drink human food. What food/drink would be their favorite and least favorite? Talking about the bots of course but feel free to include the humans too (canon and your ocs if you want!)

Ooh, this one is fun, and I went nuts with it. Reference to this post about McDonald's Sprite.

It's really long, so below the cut.

Autobots (Just doing them bc I was thinking about them. If anyone wants Cons, please send an ask and I will do them)

I think Optimus has a buck wild sweet tooth and would especially like chocolates flavored things (pastries with the tea he's constantly drinking, naturally.) He would also hate cold meat, even if it was meant to be eaten cold.

Ratchet would prefer bottled juices and smoothies because they have that Super Smooth Texture, and he has all the sensory issues (hashtag projection.) He will willingly eat other foods but won't be too chuffed about it.

Arcee probably loves chili and is one of the team's spicy people. She doesn't strike me as especially picky. She'll eat anything she can get her hands on, but she's not a fan of cottage cheese. If there's an alternative, she'd prefer that, thank you.

Bumblebee probably likes softer foods because of how messed up his throat might be. Applesauce, yogurt, ice cream, things like that. Anything especially sour, salty, or spicy is a turn-off, but he actually really likes bitter things.

Bulkhead is a pot roast guy. I don't make the rules. He'd also really like barbecued foods because of the charred taste. He doesn't strike me as a guy that likes tomato-based pasta sauces, though. Pesto is clearly the superior one.

Wheeljack eats the spiciest things he can get his hands on and looks the devil in the eye while he does it. He hates coffee served any other way than black or two creams and two sugars. How he has not wrecked his digestive tract is beyond everyone.

Smokescreen likes buttered rice and chicken with barbeque sauce. He will eat a vegetable if you demand it, but he'd prefer not to. He doesn't like soda but has a Monster Energy can collection.

Ultra Magnus is a sandwich and steamed buns guy. Anything he can easily hold with one hand while he's going over documents. This being said, he's not a huge fan of milk in his cereal (or milk, period.) He'll eat it dry, thanks.

Humans

Raf likes soups of all kinds. Even better if they don't have any chunks of meat or vegetables so he can sip it from a mug while he's working. He's still a relatively young kid, so some foods are still way too bitter for him, like radishes and Brussels sprouts.

Miko loves crunchy foods. Chips, crackers, that kind of thing. She probably prefers golden curry when she's feeling homesick. She hates peanut butter because it tastes funny to her and gets stuck in her mouth.

Jack actually does like tofu, especially with broccoli and garlic. He's the kind of person who looks for a lot of textural variety in what he eats. He's sick and tired of KO burgers, but he doesn't turn it down if he's offered free meals as a work perk.

Fowler really likes stews with bread, which works out for him because most stews are very crock-pot friendly, so he does not have to cook after a long day of dealing with the bots' bullshit and putting out fires. He hates sour gummy worms. He bought them once on accident and was so disappointed.

June absolutely puts potato chips in her sandwiches at lunch and drinks iced coffee every morning. She's not strictly a vegetarian, but as she gets older, she finds herself eating less and less meat. She REALLY does not like eggs.

Bonus: OCs

Stormy really likes a hot bowl of rice and beans or cooked vegetables. They are also team "not technically a vegetarian but doesn't eat a lot of meat." They refuse to drink coffee unless it's grossly oversweetened.

Olivia loves making and eating pierogi (her favorite fillings are potato and cheese or cabbage and mushroom, depending on her mood.) She hates cranberry juice and hard-boiled eggs, don't even try it with her.

Carbon Copy would really like fish and rice. Just like a hot piece of cooked salmon flaked and mixed up with rice. They would also hate yogurt, especially ones with weird flavors like cotton candy.

Urgency would be obsessed with pineapple and ham pizza and salted watermelon, much to the potential dismay of people around her. However, she would hate watermelon juice and watermelon-flavored candies.

Horseradish would gnaw on Milkbones because they Taste, but her favorite food would be bacon, egg, and cheese breakfast sandwiches. She would try horseradish because it's her namesake, and HATE it.

[conkreetmonkey]

Off the top of my head:

Typically doesn't chew worms, just swallows them whole, raw and wriggling. Usually slurps them up like spaghetti, one at a time, taking a moment to savor each one before swallowing. Eats them with his hands, no silverware.

Is not opposed to, and is in fact rather casual about cooking with worms as an ingredient, or otherwise turning them into other dishes or condiments (such as Rouxls's Roux).

Rouxls is in fact a being composed of gelatinous slime (very popular headcanon despite a complete lack of canon evidence). Can change viscosity from changes in emotion, but not at will. The default is quite thick and gloopy, something "half-solid" like gelatin, tar or dough. Fairly matte and quite opaque; basically, he's made of oobleck. Only really starts to "melt" in extreme cases.

His slime body holds together pretty well, perhaps having some sort of outer membrane like an amoeba (?). I've tinkered with but never fully fleshed-out the idea of single-cell Rouxls... basically, he won't drip or anything. He remains one solid "mass" of liquid unless some is cut from him.

Cannot change his form aside from the viscosity thing; like, he can't enlarge a limb at will or anything. He's a humanoid in the shape he is just naturally.

Since he's made almost entirely of a "substance" rather than flesh and bone (btw he lacks bones and is thus technically an invertebrate), he can't really "work out" his muscles to become stronger, because he literally has no muscles to begin with. He's a magical being, he just kind of wills himself to move and it happens.

He CAN grow larger by eating more food than is needed and shrink by exerting more energy than he takes in, in a system that's somewhat analogous to fat storage, but not exactly the same. An increase in mass would make him stronger, but increase his food/water needs and weight, like somewhat meat creature muscles. His body "stores" excess nutrients, energy and water in additional slime, somewhat like meat creature fat (although there is a maximum amount of water that can be stored). It's weird and alien and shit. If he starved for long enough he could die.

So BASICALLY, like some sort of magical single-celled creature, he has no bones and is just a bunch of organs floating in jelly, a flying spaghetti monster encased in opaque Jell-O. He still shits and pisses, he still needs to breathe (and can become out of breath), has a heartbeat and veins but they're probably quite simple and where the bones would be. He's an anatomically "primitive" creature, I guess one could say...

Hair, brows and lashes are NOT made of slime. idk if they're really made of keratin... he has folicles or something akin to folicles that grows it. Basically the same as human hair, it grows endlessly, has no feeling and must be washed/brushed regularly. Undecided on body/facial hair, I kind of like the idea of him having a perpetually baby-smooth face but ALSO like the idea of a five-o-clock shadow or some pit/chest hair... btw, it's naturally white and glossy, just genetics.

Eyeballs, teeth, nails, reproductive organs and a lot of the inner mouth are also not slime. Face remains intact when he melts, dw they don't pop out or anything.

Rouxls is not one-of-a-kind, and belongs to a "species" of slimes. They come in many "body" and hair colours, with Rouxls being a pretty typical representation in that regard. They also tend towards tallish, narrow frames and elflike androgyny, so he's pretty average there too. Of course, size largely depends on diet, lifestyle and individual metabolism; Rouxls is still considered slim among his kind, a twink, but is not so thin as to be unhealthy (again, they can starve).

Has a sense of feel all over his body, but only his non-slime bits feel PAIN (so if you punched him, the impact would hurt, but if you cut him, you'd have to cut deep or in a vulnerable area for it to hurt). If some slime is removed, the hole fills in with other slime pulled from the rest of his form, and the removed slime will slowly melt as it "dies" (it can be reabsorbed for a period of time after removal). After removal, his form stabilizes and becomes "thinner" looking. He, in fact, often does this to himself on purpose, with various collection tools such as ice cream scoops. Why? Because...

...it can be used for various things! He uses it as calligraphy ink (makes it more personal, using his own shade of blue). It can be boiled to create dye, which he has used on his own clothing (why they match his skin!). Rouxls is very proud of being a slime and having such a rich, beautiful blue pigment (according to him). Basically an Etsy guy, sells his shit.

(the routine removal of excess mass also keeps him as trim as he is, although he'd never admit that about his "gloriouslie slimme, elegant figure"... bro loves his worms, is a duke and is generally A Muncher, although not to an extreme degree. Also doesn't deliberately exercise ever, zero stamina. On the flip side, he has an above-average but not insane metabolism... he just likes eating, and without his slimecrafting hobby would be slowly but surely affected by this)

HE'S TRANS! I 100% vibe with this common hc. He's got the hips, eccentric fashion sense and immense love of Being Male. Has top scars because they cauterized his chest after removing them to prevent the slime from filling back in! Unsure if he's still on T, but def was at some point because of his voice. Likely retains unaltered "hardware," but again, I'm unsure. Def still has periods, though. IS VERY HAPPY WITH HIS CURRENT BODY AND WOULDN'T CHANGE A THING (excepting his "hardware" if he had the chance, and maybe he has idk). HE LIKES BEING A PRETTY-BOY GLITTER TWINK. IT WAS HIS GOAL. VERY LITTLE DYSPHORIA REMAINS.

I'm def team one-black-eye-one-blue-eye, even though it was almost certainly a mere graphical error. One of his parents was probably pen ink black and gave it to him. He loves it.

btw, slimes reproduce in a very human-like fashion. No mitosis.

Like 95% gay, but has a very intense "thing" for Queen. By far the hottest thing to him is being a powerful, villainous ruler, and the scope and ruthlessness of her campaign was the best he'd ever seen (after spending so much time among King). He's pathetically down bad for her and wants to be her second-in-command more than anything.

Fruity, flirty and gnc af. Very stereotypical gay twink. Orders elaborate cocktails at bars, crossdresses (doesn't make him dysphoric anymore), says "slay" and stuff like that, paints his nails, enjoys fashion. Would be a great "gay best friend" if he had any friends. Despite his flirtiness, easily flustered if one flirts back. Blood is cyan, so he blushes cyan (forget who I picked that hc up from).

About that, identified as a gay man until he met Queen, which has sent him into a currently unresolved label crisis (she's the only woman he's ever been attracted to, but he's more strongly attracted to her than he's ever been to anybody before). Trying to play it cool. Is currently failing.

Probably mid-to-late twenties. Pretty young, but adult.

VERY vain. Intensive hair and skin(?)care routines. Was not this vain pre-transition, just loves being a handsome man so so much.

Tries to hide it (and fails) when in front of others, but cares deeply about Lancer. Has done the vast majority of parenting since King Lost It, and has grown to love Lancer as a son. Is not great at it in purely utilitarian terms (the "3 glasses of milk dinner" Lancer mentions was a Rouxls thing), but when nobody else is looking, is so, so affectionate.

What are your Rouxls Kaard headcanons? I'd like to know.

[mlmvoreconfessionals]

I've always been tickled by the idea of vegetarian dudes who won't eat animals but will gladly gulp down other guys. Maybe they don't care about their human prey suffering, maybe they just need the protein. Does that hold any inspiration for you?

I think that's an absolutely hilarious situation that I've definitely thought of a few times before.

You always had to wonder how your v.egetarian friend still had such a heavy paunch to him. He was a bit lean all around, a bit of muscle, but then there's just a soft beer belly that seemed to always stretch out his shirt. You only ever see him eating healthy stuff, too, so you're not sure how he ended up like that. One night, while the two of you are relaxing at his place, you finally ask him why he's so chubby for someone who eats so healthy. Turns out, he's more than happy to show you why when he drags you in close and opens his maw wide. You didn't get another word out before he was slurping you down into that pot belly, bloating it out heavily as you started to squirm and thrash. Seems even v.egetarians can't resist the allure of eating men.

Being against animal cruelty is usually a reason guys end up wanting to try being v.egetarian or v.egan. Of course, to be against that, you also need to be doing something to end animal cruelty. What better way to do that then to deal with the people causing it? So, while they might have sworn not to eat animals, there's nothing against swallowing other guys whole and digesting them down. One less meat eater out there if they're gurgling down into some fat on their frame. It's all for a good cause, after all! Anything to save the animals.

They really don't tell people how bad the protein cravings get when it comes to a fully v.egan diet. With no meat at all in a diet, it usually means turning to it in other ways. Nuts can sate some men, but not a lot. And as those cravings get worse, it usually turns into targeting something that's not technically outside of their dietary restrictions. Sure, a lot of men disappear as they're guzzled down enmasse by hungry v.egans that haven't had a good slab of meat in a while, but their diet is only against having animal meat. So no one can judge them for getting their protein elsewhere...if they know what's good for them.

[athena-is-a-chaotic-lil-shit]

Of Ice and Blood

Part 6

Part 6~ cuz I love y'all <3 don't forget to drink your vitamins and keep hydrated! Stay safe and healthy my loves :)

Word count: 3k+ words

Pairing: Tai'chi Kashharzol (Orc) x Pearl Blackbell (Human OC/Reader)

Warnings: None. (tis a fluff-filled chapter)

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5

* beware of little shifts in perspective from two characters, we will be jumping casually from their minds.

*

You caught the orc staring at you again, with a smile that made his tusks jut out more. "H-Hi!" you blurted out, waving.

As you began walking towards him, you found yourself losing balance, your legs giving out. You closed your eyes reflexively and expected to land face-first on the tiled floor.

Only you didn't.

You felt a strong arm around your waist and a large hand on your back, nearly covering the expanse of it. Instead of the floor, you found yourself smushed against something warm, and that thing, you figured out a second later, was Tai'chi's chest. You became flustered and felt your cheeks and ears redden. Your nose was practically inhaling his scent now, all that musky and rich smell of his making you light-headed. Stuttering, you pulled your head back.

"I-I-I— Ta-Tai'chi???"

Congratulations self, that was perfect, wow.

"Hm? Oh, uh, sorry. I acted on impulse when I saw you collapse." He said as the grip he had on you slackened and moved to hold your shoulder to support you in case you fall again, his other hand, though, remained in its place behind you.

"Don't w-worry about it. My legs just gave out, haha."

That came out awkwardly.

Damn, he is fast.

"Are you sure you're okay?" He asked, his words filled with genuine concern. Your ears were sporting a tinge of red, he noticed. Your scent also changed, signaling you were flustered.

"Ye-yep! We should uh, head back to class now. Oh! We haven't eaten anything for lunch." You said and as if on cue, your stomach grumbled to agree, followed by another grumble but louder, it wasn't yours but Tai'chi's.

The two of you laughed from the sounds they made.

"You're right. How about we go to the cafeteria first to grab something before we head back to our classroom?" He asked, smiling down at you.

"Great idea!" You agreed, a little too eager than you would've liked.

"We should get going then."

He straightened up and removed his hand from your shoulder when he was certain you wouldn't stumble again. Though, he let his hand on your back linger a bit longer even after you left the office.

**************************************

The trip to the cafeteria was peaceful, minus the sounds of muffled talking coming from the rooms. Tai'chi was beside you as you walked down the halls, thankful that your legs found their strength again.

Arriving at the significantly less crowded canteen, both of you went ahead and ordered some food before finding a place to eat. Spotting a vacant one a few tables from the main entrance, you trudged to it, Tai'chi following close. You sat down and got a clearer look at his tray.

It was a lot, though you expected it to be. There were more vegetables than meat though.

"Not a fan of meat?"

He looked at you and laughed, echoing through the whole cafeteria, which resulted in some students glancing in your direction.

You were a bit taken aback, not expecting that sort of reaction from him.

"I'm sorry. I just- I don't know why I found it funny. I meant no offense."

"None taken."

"To answer you, I'm a huge fan of meat, red meat to be exact. This was the only portion that's left when I asked for more. And I'm still growing so I made up for the lack of meat with the vegetables. We orcs love a healthy and hearty meal."

What he said made you smile even more.

"What about you?" He glanced at your tray to see a portion almost similar to his albeit more assorted. This made him look back up and you, flabbergasted. "You can eat all of that?"

You looked down to inspect your food choice, and you instantly felt self-conscious.

"I...Uhm yes. I can." You replied, albeit meekly.

Tai'chi noticed the sudden change in your voice and made himself clear; "No, no I didn't mean it like that. I'm just, well, as you already know I haven't met many humans aside from the ones in a village back home, so I was just surprised." Watching him explain himself made you smile again. The thought of you being repulsive vanished out into thin air.

"I eat a lot. Though sometimes I eat more junk than healthy food. Anyways, let's begin, shall we? We're already late and I'm starving!" Laughing, you both know today's attendance in class isn't much of an issue. They did say there won't be any lessons today to give time for 'socializing' instead.

You stopped in your tracks when you realized you haven't shown him your face ever since you met. You looked around to see if anyone was watching and stole glances at the one in front of you. You slowly removed your mask and revealed your face. Not many have seen you without it, only those who are close to you, specifically your family.

"I guess this is the first time you've seen my face, huh?" Nervous, you asked.

Tai'chi stared at you so intensely you felt self-conscious once again. "I-Is there something wrong?"

'Shit, does he find me unattractive? Weird? Not that I expected the opposite but —'

"No. No, there's nothing wrong. You-"

"I'm what?"

"You're beautiful."

'Did he just—'

Your face heated up again and this time you had no mask to hide it.

Hastily, you covered your face with one hand and looked away.

He was snapped out of his thoughts when you did, coughing into his fist before he started eating.

Once you cooled down, you did the same. Trying to focus on the savory food they served in the uni.

Eat, damn it.

You barely noticed the orc, or perhaps you chose not to, as you wolf down your food like you haven't eaten for weeks. Another thing he found admirable and attractive. You ate cleanly, not letting a single piece of food go to waste.

He'll have to find some time later to formally introduce himself, along with other...things.

***********************************

You leaned back on your chair, noticing Tai'chi doing the same, as you let the feeling of content wash over yourselves. The food was great! You made a note to thank the cook later.

You sat up after a moment and arranged your dirty utensils. You were against the thought of making the cafeteria's job of cleaning harder than it is. So you cleaned up, stacked plates properly in your tray with concentration, you didn't realize until later that you did the same to his dishes. You didn't spare a peek up into his eyes or else you'd make a fool out of yourself again. Taking a napkin, you wiped your mouth clean before you quickly put on your mask, much to Tai'chi's dismay.

You stood up but before you could walk away, a hand reached out to grab your arm, stopping you. He stood up from his seat.

"Pearl."

"Uh, yes?"

"There's still time before our next class starts. Would you mind taking a stroll around the campus with me?"

"Y-Yeah— sure. I wouldn't mind." You replied, avoiding his gaze.

The two of you strolled around the quiet grounds of the campus. There were trees, younger than the ones in the forest. You took in the nice scenery before you, feeling the fresh, cool air, the gentle rustling of leaves, calming, and the scent of your companion to your left, relaxing and sweet. You were in a daze, barely paying attention when Tai'chi said your name and stood still.

"Hmm?"

He chuckled lightly at your response.

"I want to continue where we left off in the forest."

"Oh. Oh, of course."

"I want to know more about you, Pearl. So I'll start with my true name." He knelt down which startled you momentarily.

.

"I am Tai'chi Kashharzol, eldest of five siblings, son of Durog and Gala. I come from the Northern stronghold of clan Fatof'san. Before I came down to the city, I was trained and taught basic socialization by an old human who lived in the village under our protection.

"I went through one of my clan's traditions and hunted down my first Snow Bear. The elders gave me an honorary title to carry, right after my kill."

You stood there listening to him earnestly as he told you all of this with pride, taking in each word and committing them into memory.

"I was given the name, 'Frostbreaker'. It is my warrior name." He took a breath before he asked. "Will you honor me of becoming my friend?"

All of this sounds like a confession— technically it is but there's something, intimate about it. The way his eyes shone with such determination and something you can't figure out.

Should I ask? He stopped talking, snap out of it–

"Oh, wow. I mean yes! Yes I'll be your friend. I'd be more than happy to. The honor is mine!"

You beamed as he returned a toothy grin.

"Right. I should also say something like that, well, uh, wait." You were slightly nervous as you removed your mask, offering a shy smile before speaking.

Breathe in.

And out.

"I am Pearl Blackbell, only child and daughter of Leon and Athena Blackbell. I'm from a town, West of here, Red Springs is its name. My parents taught me martial arts, and, uh, the use of self-defense weapons." You paused and showed him your crimson knuckles. "This is my favorite one to use, I'm sure you noticed already. My father... didn't want me to leave home without any assurance that I can defend myself. You were right when you said I have experience in combat. A decent amount of it," you sighed.

"I always, almost every day, get into trouble standing up for someone, bullied, or abused. I also held my own when someone tries to harass me, smashing their faces in."

Tai'chi in turn listened closely, his gaze intense on you. He was concerned about what you implied. Many attempted to assault you? How many times? Did they hurt you? Your smile faltered as you told him the next things about yourself.

"I... didn't have friends as I grew up. People tend to be afraid of what they do not understand, y'know? They didn't want me near them, finding me weird for wearing a mask, plus my reputation for punching humans didn't help," you laughed self-deprecatingly. "So I spent my whole high school years training, mastering my art with the help of my father, who was of course, very strict and hard on me." Finding nothing else comfortable to say at this stage, you went quiet.

"Can I ask you a question?" The orc said a moment later. He was bothered by the fact you had no friends, not even one. And training, training meant pain.

"Only if I can ask one in return." You replied, feeling bold all of a sudden. He grinned at this.

"Why do you always wear a mask?"

There was no trace of ulterior motive in his scent, not the usual annoyance you smelled every time someone asked the same question. So you answered him, honestly.

"Promise you won't get weirded out?"

"I swear on my name."

"Oh. oh, okay that's good. You see, my nose, or my sense of smell specifically, is err, not normal."

Now this made Tai'chi's eyes widen. Did you have an illness of sorts? Is your health in danger? Were you h–

"I can tell how someone is feeling based on the changes in their scent. My nose is very sensitive to odors so I keep wearing a mask every time I go outside. It has been like this since I was born. My doctors say it's rare for a human to possess, they say it's special, a gift from a higher being."

"When we went in the cafeteria after our first class, "—Tai'chi inserted— "Was the reason you stopped advancing inside further, the sour and disgusting smell of the students in there?"

"Yes, actually— Wait, how did you know?" you asked.

How does he know??? Did he just smirk?

"I can smell them too."

"You can?!"

"Yes."

"So you mean to tell me, my nose functions similarly like yours?"

"Yes, perhaps, a little bit differently. Or maybe it's because you didn't hone it."

"How can you say so?"

"I can block out certain smells if I want to. And based on your reaction early on, you're having a hard time doing so, is that right?"

"W-Well, yes. You're right. Usually, I'd wear a mask with a basic filtration device, but that doesn't work when I'm inside a closed space and the scents are all mixed up and concentrated."

Tai'chi nodded in reply. He began to stand up and you were met with his towering form once again. You took a step back so you can put less strain on your neck from looking up.

"You still owe me an answer to a question by the way."

"Go on and ask then."

"So, uh, is it just me or when you told me about you...it kind of felt different from how talking to a friend sounds like..." You fidgeted, a certain heat slowly creeps up your face again as you looked around not wanting to meet his gaze. You felt your heart rate increase as you noticed his scent change, telling you you were right.

Tai'chi sighed heavily and rubbed his temples before gathering the courage to talk.

"Yes, it was different."

"So..."

"We use that kind of formality, usually towards someone we want to court."

Did he say 'court'?!

"C-Court??" you squeaked. Pretty sure your face is redder than the color of your brass knuckles, your heart hammering in your chest you believed he could hear it.

"Courting, or dating, or whatever everyone calls it down here." Breathing in deeply, he returned to kneel before you and took your hands into his, large palms caressing your small ones.

"I'll have to rephrase my words."

He locked his gaze into yours, deep blue eyes to your mahogany ones.

"Will you allow me to court you, Pearl Blackbell?"

"W-Why would you want to court me?"

The hell would someone want to court me? I'm seen as a freak by most people and I'm not soft or girly like the others. I don't like skirts or dresses. I hate makeup. I have calloused hands, scars hidden under my clothes. I don't understand —

He gave you a soft smile, cutting off your train of self-deprecating thoughts. "I can hear your mind, Pearl. Don't think low of yourself. You are amazing, y'know that? The first time I saw your eyes, and the moment you fought for my sake, I knew I was smitten. You are graceful, each motion fluid and filled with strength, people would never expect you possess until they feel it through a punch you throw. You are kind, righteous, beautiful, strong, with a heart of gold. It is a shame how most people do not see it. I want to prove myself to you, and win your heart properly."

You were about to pass out from his confession when you remembered you need to respond! Gathering what courage and energy you have left, you answered.

"I...Oh my God... I don't know what to say— I've never experienced this, ever! I'm afraid I won't know what to do- what if I mess up? What if I—"

"Listen, liga ni..." He cut you off as he rubbed circles on your hands, that small shift of language sent his voice into a guttural one. "This is also a first for me, and I share your fears in this. But my wish to pursue you remains unwavered. I will try my best to woo you, and if I do something you didn't like, it is up to you to end the courting, any time you want, and I will stop immediately. I hope we would stay friends if it comes that..." He said as he broke eye contact and looked down.

"Tai'chi..." Seeing him sad like this made your chest twist in discomfort.

Steadying yourself, you studied him, his scent was pure, no malice within his words, he was speaking from his heart. With renewed confidence, you finally decided.

"Tai'chi Kashharzol...I wish to court you as well."

He snapped up his gaze back to you and saw you smile. He scented you just to make sure you weren't doing this out of pity. The moment he realized it was genuine he lifted you in the air and spun you around. You were surprised at the sudden outburst but laughed together with him once you got over it. He set you down after a while and moved his face close to yours but halted immediately when he saw your eyes widen.

"Too forward?" He asked.

"Y-Yeah." Your heart was doing backflips, even if that sounds so ridiculous.

He understood. "I apologize, I got carried away." But before he pulled back you pressed a quick kiss on his forehead. He almost purred from the gesture but suppressed it as not to scare you in any way. You were new to this after all. He cleared his throat and reached out a hand to you.

"We should head back, our class will start soon."

"O-okay." You moved to wear your mask again before taking his hand, enjoying the rest of the walk in silence. You were still nervous, but you decided to focus on the now.

I've never felt like this before... Is it a good thing? I think it is.

And with that on your mind, you let yourself relax.

*

A pair of cruel eyes witnessed the whole exchange, remaining unnoticed as he hid behind a tree, a good distance from where you stood. They watched you and the orc walk away before they went the other direction.

"She will be fun to break. A female, human Blackbell, tempting. This will be a great chance to demonstrate and prove how monstrous an orc could be." They snickered. "I will enjoy this, exceptionally."

"In time, Pearl. In time."

****************************************

Now now who is this suspicious person?!

Liga ni — means 'little one' (as an endearment) in Orcish

Tags: @crackinanutshell @kokokatsworld @mitchiesdungeon

[currently-in-fanfiction-hell]

Days at the Hunter Base, CHAPTER 6: Cooking with the Navigators: Cookies (Originally from my Quotev account)

Pallette walked sluggishly towards Maverick Hunter HQ's kitchen, a place usually reserved for making and storing food for lunch breaks, not that Reploids needed food anyway, but if they were built with the ability to eat, then why not?

Palette, it's 5 in the morning, what are you even doing here? She thought to herself.

Shut up, I'm hungry, there must be something in here...

PALETTE, 5 IN THE MORNING, DO YOU EXPECT THERE TO BE ANY FOOD IN HERE?

Great, a back-and-forth conversation with herself, an arguement, even better, what a great way to start the day.

She opened up the fridge and found nothing but raw meat and vegetables inside, needless to say, she was very disappointed.

See? You should've just grabbed a Pocky from your snack stash. The voice inside of her head grumbled.

Nnnggghh.... But I'm getting tired of Pocky sticks, and Axl keeps stealing from the stash anyway, She whined.

Suddenly, she heard the door open.

Alia and Layer walked into the room, shocked to find Palette.

"Pallette? What are you doing in here?" Alia asked.

"I-IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE!" Palette shrieked,  Great, I'm in trouble now, she thought.

"Relax, I'm not angry at you, are you hungry?" She smiled.

"Y-yeah... That's pretty much it..." She stuttered, relieved that they weren't going to scold her.

"Layer and I were going to make cookies for breakfast, since you're here, do you want to watch us bake a batch?"

"Uh, sureeee...?" Making breakfast at 5? What oddballs. She thought.

While Alia got the ingredients out of a nearby cupboard, Layer proceeded to take out all of the other necessities, bowls, spoons, the rolling pin...

"Ever since when did you two learn how to bake?" Palette asked.

"It, um, started out as a small hobby," Layer explained, "Plus it's kind of fun, that and it's better than store-bought snacks, a-and it's healthier, of course."

Palette nodded her head, "Yeah, I guess you're right." Even if supermarket snacks/foods were easy to prepare, foods made from scratch were usually better.

"Do you know how to bake, Palette?" Layer asked.

Palette shook her head, "Unfortunately, no."

Suddenly, an idea popped up in Alia's head, "I know!" She exclaimed, "Why don't you help out? We can teach you!"

"Uh, sure!" Palette had never seen Alia this enthusiastic before, was baking that fun?

Eventually, they set everything on the table, Flour, sugar,  brown sugar, butter, vanilla extract and the necessary equipment, Palette was already getting hungry just looking at the ingredients.

"Okay, so first off, you're supposed to preheat the oven to 375°F." Alia instructed, reading from a new recipe she had found online.

"Uh, okay!" Palette turned around saw the baking oven in front of her, was it weird to admit that she was intimidated by it? After all, there were so many things she was unfamilliar with, all the buttons and dials... She didn't know what to press or turn.

"Here, let me help." Layer came over to show her the ropes, she placed her fingers on the top dial on the side of the oven, labelled "Temperature", upon closer inspection, Palette noticed that the dial had numbers marked around it, "You just turn the dial to the number you want to set the temperature to, like this." Layer then proceeded to turn the dial to 375°F, "See? It's simple."

"Hmmm, yeah, you're right!" Palette grinned.

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Shortly afterwards, it was time to move onto the main event, making the batter!

"Sooooo, what do we do first?" Palette was eager to get started, making the batter seemed like such a fun but simple task.

"Well, look at who's excited!" Alia smiled, "Anyways, what we need to do first is pour two and a quarter cups of all-purpose flour, 1 teaspoon of baking soda..."

"Mmm hmm." Palette nodded, carefully putting in the already-measured ingredients in the bowl, while Layer was watching her quietly to make sure that she wasn't doing anything wrong.

"1 teaspoon of salt-"

"Salt?! What do you need SALT for?" Palette cut her off, "Why would you need salt in cookies?"

"Well, it's not like a little bit of salt ruins an entire cookie, Palette, it won't turn salty so easily." Layer assured her, "Besides, you like salted caramel, right? So I don't really see any problem," She paused for a while, standing in the awkward silence, i-it's not like I'm saying that what you're saying is wrong, I understand where you're getting at, I-i'm just saying that salt helps, t-that's all."

"Hmmm, well, that IS a good point..." Palette said, "Alrighty, then, salt it is!" She carefully put in a teaspoon of salt in the bowl.

Shortly afterwards, Palette had put in almost every ingredient in the bowl, "Ummm, so, what do we do with the rest of the ingredients?" She asked, "Well, we're not quite done yet, Palette, Do you see thiis here?" She then pointed at another bowl, this time accompanied with a mixer, "Well, just put in the rest of the ingredients and press this button on the mixer."

"Hmm, got it!" Palette said, Alia had to make sure she didn't just dump everything in.

"Annnnd now I just need to push this button!" Palette then moved her fingers closer to the side of the mixer.

click.

Nothing happened.

"Huh? Why isn't anything happening?" Palette was puzzled, repeatedly clicking the button.

"Layer, are you sure the mixer was properly plugged in?" Alia asked, concerned.

"I-I'll see." She then checked the socket the mixer cable was connected to, surprisingly, there didn't seem to be anything wrong.

"No, sorry...There doesn't seem to be any visible problems..." Layer looked embarrassed, her face covered in a bright red.

"Don't worry, Layer, it's not your fault," Alia comforted her, "besides, that mixer is a little old, HQ never really bothered replacing it,"

"Technical difficulties aside, what are we gonna do now?" Palette asked, it was difficult to mask her disappointment.

Alia had a smile spread across her face, she didn't seem to be very bothered, "Don't worry, I've got a Plan B!"

She lifted up her right arm, a few moments later, her right hand turned into a whisk.

Palette looked amazed, "Whoah, I never knew you could do that, Alia! I mean, I knew that you could turn your hand into a Buster like X can, but this..."

"I may not be a new-generation Reploid, but according to Dr. Cain, later models of the old generation were built with several wares installed in their arms, in his words, it "was so that Reploids could better experience human culture", I'm pretty sure that both of you are also able to do the same if you wanted to."

Sure enough, new-generation Reploids were also built with this ability, Layer had managed to turn her hand into a drill, but quickly put it down, "It's a...pretty interesting feature, to say the least." She said, "By the way," Palette added, "Can't we just use a whisk from the cupboards or something?"

"We could, but an arm-whisk is much quicker to take out!' Alia smiled.

Using her arm-whisk, she managed to finish mixing the batter in no time, after that, they poured the flour mixture into the bowl, adding in two cups of chocolate chips.

"Do you want to add in nuts, Palette?" Layer asked, "Meh, no thanks, I'd rather not." Palette said.

They mixed it all together (using a spoon this time), and it was actually looking quite good,

"Hey, d'you think I could try a bit of cookie dough?" Palette asked.

"I wouldn't recommend it, but I guess it's fine..." Alia mumbled, she quickly realized, however, that Palette had already started licking cookie dough off of her fingers, Alia let out a small sigh.

They used a mini ice cream scoop to lay out the cookie dough onto the baking sheets, making sure that each induvidual scoop was spaced far enough from each other so that they could bake into their proper size and avoid them into merging together.

After that, they plopped it into the oven, now all they had to do was wait.

"How long will we have to wait for, again?" Palette asked.

"10 minutes, I think..." Alia took a look at the recipe again, "It shouldn't take too long-" Suddenly, a young, rookie Hunter came into the room, "E-excuse me, are Alia and Layer here?"

"Yes, what is it?" Layer asked, hoping that nothing urgent was happening.

"I-it's nothing much, but there's a small problem regarding the 13th Unit's expedition, and the Commander needs a couple of Navigators to sort things out, I know it's early in the morning, but-"

"We'll be right there." Alia told him, she turned to look at Palette, "You can look out for the cookies while we're gone, right?"

"Yeah, don't worry, Just leave it to me!' She grinned and waved them off as the door shut.

Palette looked at the time, eight minutes left, eh, I'll probably have enough time to try and beat that level...She thought to herself as she pulled out a portable console.

_______________________________________________

"STAGE CLEAR!" Yelled the announcer.

"YES!" Palette cheered as she looked at the badly-beaten-up dragon lying down on the ground defeated as her avatar did a victory pose on the screen of her little portable.

"Wow, that took a while...I've probably levelled up enough to go to the next stage, let's see...Smoky Skies?" just then, something hit her head like a metal pipe, "Wait...smoke?"

She looked up from the screen, she must've been too absorbed into beating the boss, because she then realized that the smell of smoke was coming from the oven, "Oh, no..."

Just then, the door opened, Alia and Layer walked in, "Hey, Palette, sorry for being late, there was a small complicat-" Alia paused as she saw what was going on, they both rushed to the oven and immediately took the cookies out, what should've been cookies with a nice, golden brown color were now a very, very dark brown.

"I-I'm sorry, I didn't pay enough attention, it's my fault, and-"

"It's alright, Palette, we can always try again next time." Layer told her, "There's always a first time for everything, after all."

"Thanks, Layer." Palette smiled, she looked at the cookies, "They may be burnt, but they could still taste good, have hope." Alia told her.

Just as Palette was about to grab a cookie, Alia grabbed her hand, "We'll still have to wait for them to cool, be patient."

"Alright, fine..." Palette mumbled, despite the fact that she was starving, well, not really, Reploids couldn't really get hungry the same way humans do, but she just needed to fuel herself up with some food, nevertheless, she waited.

_______________________________________________

A while later, they sat down at a table in the HQ's cafeteria, eating the burnt cookies (which were still pretty good, surprisingly) and sharing small stories and laughing together, Palette had noticed a slight personality change in them recently, they had become more relaxed and cheery with the lack of any threats, which was a good thing, they all needed a nice break every now and then.

"So, what did you think of your first baking session, Palette?" Layer asked, "I hope that, um, incident didn't ruin it all."

"Oh, not at all!" Palette told them, "it was actually...kinda nice, we should try this again sometime!" She grinned.

"Glad that you enjoyed it!" Alia said, "Speaking of trying it again, there's going to be a new Navigator working with us in a few weeks, why don't we try and bake these again as a welcome gift?" She suggested.

"That sounds like a good idea," Layer nodded her head, "Her name was...RiCO, wasn't it?"

"Yeah, RiCO, she seems to be very enthusiastic about working with us, seems like a nice person, what do you say?"

"I'm in!" Palette cheered, "...As long as I don't mess up again, heheh!"

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(Author's Notes): Whew! Finally finished this after ages and ages of procrastination-I mean, schoolwork! I'll admit, part of me didn't want to write this chapter after a while, I wanted to write a baking fic, but it turns out that I was incapable of writing out baking stories, I also feel a bit skeptical about my characterization of the Navigators, Alia in particular, I prefer her more serious and hardworking personality in X5-X7, but I guess her softer X8 personality was better for a fic like this.

Anyways, I'll still be working on this, don't worry, next up is an Axl chapter!

Ack, almost forgot! Here's the recipe I used (and butchered) for this chapter!

[theaethernetconnection]

Oh also, just adding onto this, I think that the demons in good omens do this exact same thing of following the Bible to the word except by literally trying to be anti everything heaven is. And that's why it causes so many problems, because as you can see throughout the centuries, heaven does some pretty fucked up things. For example, the story of Job and the whole...killing his children and just like...replacing them? (Real and in the Bible btw) is so messed up.

How are you supposed to choose to be pure evil and the opposite of heaven--which is supposed to be pure good--when archangels are smiting humans into salt whenever they inconvenience them? I think that the show does a beautiful job introducing these dilemmas while walking us through aziraphale's growth as an angel (such as the gravedigger episode).

More specifically, the unlearning of a lot of things that have been drilled into his head all of his existence. I very much relate to this experience, having been raised in a Christian household and now later in life having to unlearn the things that I've been told make me "unholy".

Aziraphale has been taught that temptations are bad, and the first time he eats meat he discovers this craving he has never known he could sate. It's always rubbed me so much the wrong way that angels "don't soil their celestial bodies with gross matter". It's like they don't live, don't know what it's like to live and to do this perfectly natural thing. It might be a silly or frivolous example to human perspective, but of course we would think that, as we've known food all our lives. But when you compare this same idea to ideas like "sex is dirty/unholy before marriage" and this notion of "purity" it's much of the exact same thing.

I really love how the show presents two characters with very different coping methods to their religious trauma (and oh boy do they have trauma). For Crowley he was dropped very suddenly from the grace of heaven and copes through outward anger and holding people at arm's length because he feels he cannot trust anyone again. You can see these physical guards he has built up and how hard it has been to become comfortable enough with aziraphale to take them down. And yet, in angel standards, they're technically more holy than aziraphale in terms of "not soiling their body" and the like.

For aziraphale, his trauma looks a lot like a father-son abusive relationship, especially once the metatron comes into the picture. His religious teachings still stick with him, are still engrained in his head, and thus he thinks that he is the one who has to do better, to please heaven. To be more holy. He may partake in eating food, but clearly feels very guilty about it as Gabriel in season one criticized him for it, to the point where he had to lie (also not seen as angelic even tho the archangels literally do that all the time but that's a different point). So once the metatron, the voice of god herself, affirms his consuming of the coffee, aziraphale feels forgiven, feels that his sins were absolved and his lifestyle accepted, and that maybe heaven isn't as abusive as he was thinking. Maybe going back to church won't be as bad as I think...

So aziraphale falls back into these cycles of abuse that are very common in religious institutions. And it's exactly how other abuse works too: shame the person for who they are and then reach out a tiny bit of approval and they latch onto it. Churches need you to confess your sins because everyone is "dirty" and "unholy" in their eyes. It's a cycle of shame and leaves a lot of young children feeling resentment and like they're not worth enough. Especially not worth enough being without the institution that absolved you of your "unholiness", the very institution that leeches off of you.

Crowley sees his own religious trauma in aziraphale, that naive hope that heaven might be okay this time, that he can fix it. Crowley knows that that's not how it works, from his own 6000+ years of trauma and healing from being thrown out from the very parental figures and religion he was devoted to. That's where we get the line from him about knowing/understanding a lot more than aziraphale does. He doesn't want to see aziraphale get hurt clearly, but aziraphale broke his heart in the process due a lot to his "I forgive you".

To aziraphale, it meant I forgive myself and you for sinning by giving into these "unholy" cravings to be in a relationship together. To him it meant that he was trying to make them both "pure" according to what he had been taught.

But of course, Crowley hears this and hears that aziraphale thinks they are a sin to be together and it breaks him. He thinks aziraphale wants to fix him to be pure so that they can be in heaven together.

Back to the demon thing, since they have tried to be the exact unholy and dirty that heaven despises, you now have this Hell that is very picture perfect biblically, but in the process of trying to be the opposite of everything heaven is, they kept the bureaucracy and the idea of being an institution and basically created their own cycle of abuse. Think about it, you have a bunch of fallen angels with their own religious trauma from being angels and in the attempt to make their own space they end up making an abusive situation as it is the only thing they have ever known.

In my original post by Crowley vs aziraphale's methods, I mean how they are both dealing with this religious trauma and their own abusive cycles. Crowley has tried the assimilation method, the changing from the inside, the suggestion box, and it did not work out for him. In his view, it will come down to the abuse of heaven and hell vs. the beauty of human kind.

I truly believe that that is the message Neil gaiman is attempting to get across in the larger three seasons of the beauty of human kind, and how strong we all are. We have the strength to make our own paths, and love, and make mistakes, and delight in pleasures of sushi, and be honest to our friends (the them really stopped the apocalypse and so called ineffable fate all on their own). And we have the strength to heal from abuse. Every major character shows this in their own way from Nina to Gabriel, and I'm hoping in season three, our main duo.

The connection between doing exactly what the Bible says as it is written vs. doing what the actual good thing is and following the lessons of the bible and then good omens and how the angels are following the word and Crowley is doing what is right. AND aziraphale knows this and he knows that Crowley didn't deserve to fall and he decided he will change the system because clearly it's wrong, clearly they can't see the goodness in front of them, clearly it needs fixing since it outcast a demon doing good...

And then you think about the real world and how institutionalized religion follows words and cherry picks to validate their discriminatory and hateful actions instead of the morals the bible teaches and how love your neighbor is exactly what aziraphale and Crowley do in season two and exactly what queer communities do with their mutual aid and pride and...

God good omens really is what you get out of it. The whole heaven/hell system is broken. Institutionalized religion is broken.

And soon in season three we'll see that systems cannot be fixed from the inside, they can only be brought down and made anew. (Aziraphale vs Crowley's methods)